


What are enemies for?

by KtheG



Series: FallenHalo [1]
Category: Warrior Nun (TV)
Genre: Don't talk to me, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, FallenHalo?, I NEEDED THIS, Pre-Relationship, This is literally just a fic of dealing with trauma through cuddling, so soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2020-08-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 08:00:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25719955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KtheG/pseuds/KtheG
Summary: A pairing that will probably never happen again, but I had FEELINGS.Ava sucks at processing trauma and as a result, she and Lilith grow... closer than anybody expected but it's cute and fine and nobody is panicking at all.
Relationships: Sister Lilith/Ava Silva
Series: FallenHalo [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1865551
Comments: 7
Kudos: 85





	What are enemies for?

**Author's Note:**

> So we can thank my own life for this. Who knows if it will get finished in a timely manner, school is a pain in the butt. Hopefully this satisfies those at the discord who gave me the idea.

Ava can’t remember the last time she slept well. It probably (definitely) had to do with the fact that the last time Ava actually slept she ended up dead and then resurrected with a piece of godly metal in her back. So Ava doesn’t sleep anymore. She catches a few hours here and there but it’s never really restful and always ends when Ava’s body jerks awake and she bolts upright, breathing hard, trying to determine if she’s actually alive or if this has all been a massive fever dream. 

So Ava doesn’t sleep. These are the observations Lilith has made over the last few weeks and the only time Lilith has seen the other girl actually unconscious is usually after a fight and she’s drained the halo trying to save their asses because Adriel refuses to die. Lilith notes that it’s these times that Ava doesn’t move (which is a scary enough thought for Ava so she refuses to bring it up) and it’s the only time she appears to be fully relaxed. Which isn’t great. It should not require falling unconscious in order to rest peacefully. And so Lilith observes and tracks the patterns. Ava seems to sleep better when there’s someone else around, and doubly so if there’s some form of physical contact. Usually it’s Beatrice, but Lilith finds herself being chosen more often these days. She doesn’t know why and it’s kind of disconcerting because as far as Lilith is concerned, Ava should still hate her. But apparently all it takes is a trip to Hell to sort out emotions and how to be human. 

So Lilith finds Ava knocking on her door more often these days (nights). Ava really only comes for the cuddles (“you’re taller than me and you’re strong. Of course I want your arms around me”) for a few hours, then her phone alarm will go off and Lilith is left wondering why Ava chose her to take naps with. (Aside from the obviously stated reasons, Lilith can’t comprehend anybody coming to her for physical contact). But the incidents keep happening and thus she is left to over analyze them to try and find some sort of meaning in them. 

All she can come up with is the shared experience of experiencing a different side of life (Hell for herself, and heaven (?) for Ava) but somehow these experiences allow the two women to understand each other better. And so Lilith learns. She goes to Camila to ask for proper cuddling techniques, especially those that can help reduce stress and anxiety. She goes to Mary to learn how to touch without hurting (because despite the fact that both she and Ava are practically indestructible, these vulnerable moments require vulnerable touches). She goes to Beatrice to learn how to talk things through. She learns from the three other women how to be a better human all so Ava can get some sleep. 

(She begins to wonder three weeks in why she’s putting in so much effort for a girl she hated a month ago, and decided to ask that question later.)

But overall, the sleeping arrangement continues until one night, Lilith turns off Ava’s alarm while the girl is still asleep just to see what will happen. After the four hour mark (Ava’s usual time allotment), the girl in Lilith's arms begins to tremble. It’s so subtle at first that Lilith is not even sure it happened, but sure enough, Ava starts shaking like a leaf in a fall wind before she shoots up and off the bed. Stuck in shock, Lilith is unable to more than watch as Ava looks frantically around the room trying to register where she is. The poor girl is working herself into a panic and so Lilith manages to shit off her emotions enough to help Ava. 

Carefully, Lilith wraps her arms around Ava from behind, trapping the younger girl in her embrace. Stuck in what to do next, Lilith recalls a conversation with Beatrice about talking. (“It’s going to be… uncomfortable at first. But you have to stay grounded. Emotions are best handled with a clear mind.”) And so Lilith starts talking. It starts off light, about how Ava was doing in training, about a joke Mary told her that afternoon (“you’d hate it Ava. There was no creative wordplay.”) about how Camila is going to teach Lilith to cook a traditional paella. Lilith talks about nothing and slowly but surely, the trembling girl in her arms begins to breathe easier. Ava’s hand grips at Lilith’s shirt, a tight fist refusing to let go despite the awkward angle. 

“Tighter.” 

It takes Lilith a moment to register the command, Ava spoke so quietly she almost had to as for a repition, but when it clicks in her brain, she wraps her arms around Ava with more force, accessing some of her demon abilities to squeeze a little harder than she would normally feel comfortable doing. It seems like the pressure is enough, because Ava goes slack in her arms. 

“Okay?” Lilith asks, unsure of the protocol for helping the Halo Bearer through a panic attack. All she receives in return is a sleepy mood and a low hum. With that, Lilith moves to let Ava go, knowing how much the girl values her independence. Ava shocks her, however, by turning to hug Lilith. They’ve shared hugs before but never with this much emotion behind the action. 

“Thanks. Usually I’m gone by now so you don’t have to deal with this shit. I know I can be a lot sometimes.” 

“Ava, this is what sisters are for isn’t it? What good is it doing you to deal with this by yourself? None. Let us help you like you’ve helped us- me. Stay and sleep some more. I’ll be here the whole time.” Lilith is a little surprised by her offer. That is not what she expected to say at all, but she knows she won’t regret helping Ava. 

The Halo Bearer shrugs and begins to stand to climb back into Lilith’s bed but her legs don’t seem to be fully cooperating so she stumbles a little, almost like a baby deer learning to walk for the first time. A small chuckle leaves Lilith’s lips at the thought and Ava gives her a questioning look. 

“I’ll tell you in the morning when I can embarrass you in front of the others.” 

Together, the two of them climb back into bed, with Lilith opening her arms for Ava to snuggle into, knowing the other girl feels safest there. 

And that’s how Mary finds them the best morning when the two are late for breakfast. She takes a picture on her phone for blackmail and then knocks looks enough for Lilith to hear. The older girl startled which results in Ava falling off the bed once again. She lets out a moan of discomfort at being tossed to the floor but manages to mumble a quiet “five more minutes.” Lilith and Mary share a knowing look and start talking loudly about the bacon that is sure to accompany this morning's meal. Sure enough, Ava jumps up from the floor and is out the door quicker than a bat out of hell. 

Before Mary can say anything, Lilith is shushing her and pushing the American out the door towards the dining hall. 

“Not. A. Word.” The threat is unspoken but Lilith puts a little demon voice into it to let Mary know she means business. Mary just holds her hands up in surrender and the two girls follow Ava’s lead to the dining hall of Cat’s Cradle. 

When they get there, Ava is frowning at her plate, disappointed by the lack of bacon. 

“I was tricked! I demand bacon for breakfast.” Lilith can’t help but smile at the other girls' antics. “I say just for this I don’t have to fight Lilith in training today.”

“Afraid you’ll lose, Silva?” Lilith can’t help but taunt just a little because the reality of it is that Ava has improved vastly in the last month or so that she’s almost able to knock down Lilith. 

Ava doesn’t respond and seems to retreat into her shell and Lilith can’t help but feel a little hurt at the action. She and Ava have moved into this competitive friendship since the Vatican and Ava never passes on an opportunity to fight Lilith. Ava’s quiet demeanor remains for the rest of breakfast and into their morning session and Lilith can’t help but think she did something wrong. She thought she handled this morning's events quite well but maybe Ava felt differently? She would have to ask Beatrice or Camila later this afternoon. These stupid human feelings were getting distracting.

Despite Ava’s reluctance to fight Lilith, they end up facing off after lunch because Beatrice is convinced the only way to train a heavenly being is with another (which always gets an argument that Lilith is actually from Hell so does she really count?). As always, Lilith wins, ending with a nasty punch to the face that sends Ava to the floor. However, unlike normal, Ava doesn’t get right back up. Lilith can see some blood on her face despite how quickly Ava attempted to turn away from her. 

“Ava, are you alright?” While the words may be full of concern, Lilith is careful not to express too much emotion, still questioning herself after this morning’s display that has apparently phased Ava. While Lilith may not be one for verbal expressions of emotion, she still dares to lay a hand on Ava’s shoulder, to turn the other girl so Lilith can inspect Ava’s face, to make sure the Halo Bearer is actually okay.  
“I’m fine Lilith. No need to worry.” and with that, Ava stalks off towards her room. 

Nobody sees Ava for the rest of the day, and Lilith is determined to fight against the part of her (definitely the half-demon part) that wants to go check and make sure Ava is really okay. By the time dinner rolls around, Camila sounds worried, and just as Lilith begins to stand to go check on Ava, the walls of Cat’s Cradle begin to shake. 

It’s not unusual for things to happen to the Cathedral they call home (Camila is convinced the place is haunted) but this is new. The shaking doesn’t last long, but instead, what follows could definitely be from a ghost. A small blast of Halo light can be seen moving through the walls, and because Lilith can teleport (being a half demon has some perks), she is the first to reach Ava’s room. 

The girl is on the floor next to her bed, nose bleeding, and quivering like a wet chihuahua. Footsteps can be heard hammering in the hall behind Lilith, so she sticks her head out the door and effectively halts the approach of the other three sisters. Beatrice takes the hint and pulls Camila and Mary to a stop before they approach more calmly. When Lilith pokes her head back into the room, Ava is sobbing so hard she can barely breathe, and the Halo is still glowing like a small sun. The other girls have to shield their eyes, but Lilith takes it in stride (Hell burned much brighter) and pulls Ava into her arms, repeating her actions from this morning. Slowly but surely, Ava begins to calm and the glow from the Halo diminishes enough for the others to come and offer their comfort for the Halo Bearer. 

Beatrice is the first to notice the blood and helps Lilith shift Ava (who is still in the middle of coming down from an epic panic attack) so that she can assess the damage. 

“I don’t think anything’s broken. We should be more concerned with why she isn’t healing.” 

“I think… I’m not sure if this could be of help, but Ava hasn’t been sleeping, at least to my knowledge. If she’s not sleeping, the Halo probably doesn’t get a chance to recharge. She’s been bunking with me for a few hours every night.” Lilith’s words seem to spark recognition in the other Sister’s, but nobody seems to know what to do at this moment. 

Lilith and Beatrice sit and hold Ava for who knows how long while Mary and Camila disappear, only to come back with food and some water. Eventually, Lilith looks down at Ava in an attempt to get her to eat only to realize that she has fallen asleep. Together, the four get Ava onto her bed and under the covers. Mary sets a plate of fruit on the bedside table with a glass of water and leads Camila and Beatrice out of the room, leaving a half demon to tend to the Halo Bearer. Probably not her best plan, Lilith thinks. She wouldn’t put herself and Ava on opposite sides (she can recognize that Father Vincent played their whole group) but she also doesn’t know what she is yet or what side she falls on while Ava is obviously on the side fighting for good. So as it stands, Lilith doesn’t feel wholly comfortable being left in charge of Ava.

But apparently, her sisters all believe that Lilith is the best person to attempt to help Ava through her trauma. (Because shared trauma somehow makes it easier to deal with? The jury’s still out on that). So here she is, attempting to help Ava sleep. That means cuddling. The thought makes Lilith shudder; she has never initiated any form of cuddling. It’s almost always Ava who snuggles into Lilith’s side during those movie nights. But now, Lilith finds herself drawing back the covers and scooting in behind Ava. It’s in that moment that Lilith realizes that something as innocent as touch could be so healing. She never had that option as a child and so she became an adult with a distinct lack of compassion or humanity. 

The fact that cuddling with Ava felt so good shocked Lilith. What was even more shocking was the thought that she wouldn’t mind doing this in a less platonic way.


End file.
